What grinds my gears is the fact that guys who cheat most of the time have a good lady. He will run all over her. Be the biggest asshole in the world and she manages to stay around. When you for example, go out to the club and you knowingly pick up a chick and bang her while you’re in a relationship I do not agree with that notion. I also do not need/want to be with 1000 women for life to be fulfilled. I however do not judge others with issues of their infidelity. It’s not my demon to face. I only want to please 1 as many as times humanly possible. It’s the attraction I think of the “I can change them” mentality that many people (including myself) have. I see this is not always the case. A man/woman will do what they want until they are ready to commit if ever. I am a good man and I don’t cheat but most of the guys around me do (or did) and they seem to have gotten off without any backlash. I know I have been a good man and I get lied on about being a cheater which makes no sense to me. All it makes me aware of is that people are watching at all times and I plan on giving them great things to observe and hate on because I will not stop being great. I’m no retaliator because I believe Karma will do everything she needs to do for me.
I’ve been reading this blog of this other transman and his experience with phalloplasty. I must admit it kinda made me really think about the surgery and it scares me. When people are going through embarrassing things and they decide not to post for awhile because of this, it can give the impression that everything is hunky dory when in fact it’s hell on Earth. For example when a guy cannot use the bathroom correctly he may not post it due to anxiety and known technique/surgeon flunkies who blame him for his pain.
I do have a favorite surgeon however and his name is Dr. Curtis Crane in California. I love his team’s technique for the glansplasty and his overall work that I’ve seen so far. I know that going to him does not guarantee a complication free surgery but I believe his team will have the knowledge and experience to fix any problems that arise. I’m happy to be back to my writing on this blog though during this rough semester. School has been kicking my ass but I hope to bounce back soon. Writing makes me happy because it’s my gift. I know it is…I do it well and I’m realizing in order to get the things I want I need to feed more into my gifts. I think sometimes about writing a book. One day at a time…
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