I took a day off in between my writing just to get myself together and be a little selfish. My leg has been a really big downer for me. I really hate the fact that I can’t go hard like I want to without pain. I tried to carry my laundry up the steps and had to deal with my leg being sore for hours because of it. I can blame no one but myself for going to fast. I have also been dealing with a lot of internal struggle as I now have the time to deal with my emotions and everything hit me in the face. I have immersed myself in a little cocoon for awhile till I can get back on my feet physically and mentally. I have always been so stuck on everyone else’s feelings and not my own that I never put myself first but not any longer. I am my own man and I can deal with the consequences of my actions but its hard when everyday it is something else. It’s like the little things add up into a big pile of crap that seems too much to handle sometimes. I will get my emotions together though. It will just take me time. I always try to be the positive guy or always try to be understanding.
When can I be an asshole?
I refuse to be a stepping stool. I feel I’ve always tried to take the high road in a lot of things but that takes so much energy. I end up with none for myself and it started to take a toll on me. Life has told me to slow down and find a positive path for yourself. Be a man about your stuff.
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