Subconscious

I am freaked out, turned on, and curious at the same time. Well this morning I woke up to feeling up my girlfriend. I did not realize what was happening till I fully woke up to basically having dry sex with her. I could have sworn I was dreaming and that is what kinda creeps me out as I have no recollection to what I dreamed about. I heard moaning and encouragement while I was still half asleep to continue to touch her. She also recalls dreaming about sex as well at the same time and I guess I was in a dreamlike state and drawn to her as she was sending me subconscious signals and we had soul sex. I mean I dont know I am just rambling on but I need to get this out my system. I know for a fact that my girlfriend in my eyes is very sexy and I get turned on by no one else but her. She has the ability to get my dick hard by just giving me the eye and I enjoy it. She does have some control of me and my very high libido but not total. I love her and this is why I guess its okay. I am indeed craving some real intimacy but I guess that will happen in time.Anyway in terms of my transition I have seen a little growth in my penis. I know I will see more results when I finally get my pump. I have a feeling im going to have a nice sized penis in time. I am in no rush to create perfection for myself.I am looking to get my surgery done by Dr. Miro either way if I get a meta or an mld phallo since he does both of these procedures. I will go to miro if I can save some money to go because im not sure if he is covered by insurance seeing as he is not an American surgeon. I hope to be leaving for school soon so I can go on with my life and my transition.

I am becoming a hairy wolf as well. My gf tells me about my hairy back all the time. It has started to get to me a bit because I didnt want to be to hairy but im taking it as it comes. Another thing I wanted to point out was my change in orgasm. I have felt like I was floating off the ground as my orgasm was very intense and much stronger then before especially if I have one in the first few days of my shot. I hope to be able to keep this capability after I get my surgery. My decision has changed a bit as I am thinking about get a meta first just to see how much I can get out of my own penis before I start grafting any skin from my body. Its just an idea to maybe put less stress on my body and to see if I can handle just having that in the beginning. We shall see where life takes me. I am not sure what surgeon I would go to but I will find out soon.

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